Category: Humor/Fiction

I am not going to win this thing with logic. Logic has no bearing whatsoever on the situation…

There’s always a silver lining. I saw on the news yesterday, that arrests are way down…

So I finally give up, and switch to a classic music station. I hear the voice of Barry McGuire…

“It’s all customizable and controlled by electronic buttons on a panel next to your seat….”

I understand that the path to a man’s heart is often littered with the bones of large, edible farm animals… beef, pork… perhaps an occasional lamb… if you’re feeling less romantic, a chicken…

Suppose, as a kid, I happened to be competing in a spelling bee, and lost, all because of Brussels sprouts?

“An awful lot of adults see these zombie movies and TV shows and think zombies are frightening…”

I’m not sure what kind of glasses would be appropriate for a dog, but I suspect he would look distinguished in black frames…

My dad used to say, you can tell when a politician is lying: whenever his mouth is moving…

US Trade Representative’s Office revealed a list of $200 billion worth of Chinese imports that would be to subject to 10 per cent tariffs – including “hats and headgear”…

“Well, you know, it’s not a simple thing to make America great again, and if we have to drink bad coffee for a few years, that’s a small price to pay….”

Two years later, I still hadn’t learned to read and wasn’t really keeping up on politics yet, so I missed hearing about the Federal Trade Commission report to Congress…

Facebook thoughtfully reminded me, yesterday, that it was my friend Winston’s birthday. Normally, I would have been grateful for the reminder — I don’t have a impressive record, remembering friends’ birthdays….

“The President’s problem is, he’s not ambitious enough. He needs to think bigger. The wall they’ve been talking about is too… I don’t know, it’s too wimpy…”