READY, FIRE, AIM: What, Me Worry?

The world, it would seem, has gone mad.

But, as Daily Post readers may (or may not) know, the satirical magazine that has been documenting our slow but inexorable descent into madness since 1952 — MAD Magazine — faded into the sunset last summer, canceled by its corporate owners, DC Comics.

Where is Alfred E. Neuman when we need him most?

The famous Mr. Neuman first appeared on the cover of MAD Magazine in December 1956, but he had already enjoyed decades of employment as poster boy for patent medicine painkillers, family restaurants, dentist offices, auto repair shops and theatrical productions.

Here’s Mr. Neuman on a postcard, advertising Antikamnia Pain Tablets, in 1908. “It Didn’t Hurt a Bit.”

And here he is, in a magazine ad, helping to promote a cafe in Texas, circa 1940:

Mr. Neuman’s very first advertising appearance may have been on a poster for a stage play called The New Boy, which had successful runs in London and New York in 1894. The play reportedly followed the adventures of a smallish 30-something character named Archibald Rennick, as he attempted to pass himself off as a school kid.

Alfred E. Neuman’s original 1956 portrait for MAD Magazine was painted by veteran commercial artist Norman Mingo, who was portraying Mr. Neuman as a write-in presidential candidate — a reasonable alternative to the Republican and Democrat candidates that year, perhaps? As the US and Russia each raced to build up the largest arsenal of hydrogen bombs…

…he appeared on that MAD cover with his now-familiar motto, “What? Me Worry?”

We might view the the somewhat surprising rise of Alfred E. Neuman — from a fraudulent student in 1894, to a presidential candidate in 1956 — as evidence of America’s progress during the first half of the 20th century.

It appears, however, that Mr. Neuman’s smiling face will no longer be gracing our newsstands. We will have other magazine cover faces to consider, as we stumble into the third decade of the 21st century. The replacements? Joe Biden? Xi Jinping? Boris Johnson?

British Prime Minister Boris Johnson

But what about Mr. Neuman’s motto? What, me worry?

Can we finally find a reason — in the winter of 2020-2021, in the very midst a massive global health emergency, as the US argues over the results of a presidential election, and while our children and grandchildren wonder aloud, what the hell we’re going to do about climate change — can we finally find a reason, and the courage, to embrace Mr. Neuman’s optimistic motto?

I’m sitting here thinking about how Alfred E. Neuman has been smiling through all of it:

The Cold War.

The Cuban Missile Crisis.

Vietnam.

Watergate.

The Arab Oil Embargo.

The S&L Crisis.

The Gulf War.

9/11.

Iraq.

Afghanistan.

The Great Recession.

Star Wars: The Phantom Menace.

Backstreet Boys.

And I’m thinking about how he would still be smiling his innocent smile… if he were here among us.

Louis Cannon

Louis Cannon

Underrated writer Louis Cannon grew up in the vast American West, although his ex-wife, given the slightest opportunity, will deny that he ever grew up at all.