Category: Humor/Fiction

Facebook thoughtfully reminded me, yesterday, that it was my friend Winston’s birthday. Normally, I would have been grateful for the reminder — I don’t have a impressive record, remembering friends’ birthdays….

“The President’s problem is, he’s not ambitious enough. He needs to think bigger. The wall they’ve been talking about is too… I don’t know, it’s too wimpy…”

It’s great to know that the federal government has become so generous with musicians. Would that everyone were as generous…

You may not remember me, because it’s been a long time since we chatted at Macy’s Department Store…

Anyway, it kind of ruined Halloween for me this year. The neighborhood kids had apparently taken notice of the half-eaten pumpkin on their way to school…

How could hundreds of intelligent citizens give input into the Colorado Water Plan… and not a single mention of our water-loving friend, the beaver?

George crossed his arms defensively. “And what, pray tell, does public opinion have to do with my well-earned retirement?”

But the really scary stuff has nothing to do with zombies or ghosts. Although it might have something to do with clowns….

Well, gosh. I didn’t know President Trump had been counting on me in the first place. Nobody tells me about this stuff, until it’s too late…

“It has been pretty conclusively proven that the earth is undergoing a period of surprisingly intense global warming…”

Imagine how different America would have been, if Congress — instead of forever severing our political ties with Great Britain — had simply gone around to the corner tavern and knocked down a few beers?

And then we have the situation where a cat and a dog live together in the same house, as fast friends, and get along famously — sleeping in the same bed and even licking each other’s face…

“Isolated events, like the one this past weekend in Pagosa, certainly need to be taken into account as we develop our complex climate models…”

“Nice view,” said Richard, with a slight Texas drawl. Richard Butz was leaning on the pressure-treated railing, looking out over Village Lake at the majestic READ MORE

“No, I’m pretty much a small-town girl. I hardly ever make it as far as Durango. But it’s okay… I like small towns….”

Is that stupid, or what? The psychic down the street can come up with a better answer than “2.65”…

We now call this system “Euclidean geometry” although Euclid himself probably called it by some kind of Greek name…

In the beginning, God made each of us with ten fingers. And unless we played with fireworks or hunting knives when we were kids, we probably still have ten fingers…

In 1492 Christopher Columbus, and a crew consisting largely of sailors forced into service by the Spanish Crown, sailed happily off on a trip to the East Indies in three borrowed boats…