It seemed like life simply couldn’t get any funnier…
Author: Louis Cannon
Underrated writer Louis Cannon grew up in the vast American West, although his ex-wife, given the slightest opportunity, will deny that he ever grew up at all. You can read more stories on his Substack account.
READY, FIRE, AIM: No News is Good News
Eventually, Pagosa Springs will come back to life and our local newspapers will, once again, have criminal activity and outrageous government blunders to write about…
READY, FIRE, AIM: Where’s My Liability Protection?
Please don’t take this as a cynical criticism, but does Mitch McConnnell look like someone who takes action “fast”?
READY, FIRE, AIM: Nothing is the Same Anymore
A related controversy concerns the direction the team might take with the new name…
READY, FIRE, AIM: The Joys of Obesity
Back in April, when all the toilet paper disappeared, I came to the conclusion that Little Debbie Happy Camper Cakes were probably next to go…
READY, FIRE, AIM: Weddings are Now Essential
“Weddings, Jared. Weddings. Dozens, maybe hundreds of people, of all ages, laughing, drinking champagne, dancing, making speeches. Just think about it…”
READY, FIRE, AIM: Ain’t No Mountain High Enough
Both Nepal and China sent teams to measure the peak within the past 12 months, and the result ended any differences about the height of the world’s most famous mountain…
READY, FIRE, AIM: Shoot Me Up, Doc
The waiting room was almost empty when I walked in, which should have been a red flag. But I took it as good luck; I wouldn’t have to wait in a long line to get my vaccination…
READY, FIRE, AIM: My Frustrated Dream of Becoming Famous
That was all the encouragement I needed, to start picturing myself in a tuxedo, playing a Steinway and backed by a symphony orchestra…
READY FIRE, AIM: The Daily Post 2020 Holiday Gift Guide
While an undersized waffle maker is not technically a ‘food’, it is capable of producing something closely resembling ‘food’…
READY, FIRE, AIM: Santa Reveals His Politics
The third float featured Santa Claus, making his traditional appearance in his magical, reindeer-drawn sleigh, accompanied by Ms. Claus and several elves…
READY, FIRE, AIM: Chicken Little, During the Pandemic
“I just look at the graphs, in the COVID section. Who can keep up with all the articles?”
READY, FIRE, AIM: My Letter to Santa
“For security reasons, potential adopters must be vetted by going through a short registration and ID verification process…”
READY, FIRE, AIM: Hey, Mr. Spaceman
All of which suggests that the US Space Force will not be sending a bunch of hot-shot space pilots into low earth orbit to conduct battles with hand-held laser pistols…
READY, FIRE, AIM: What, Me Worry?
The world, it would seem, has gone mad…
READY, FIRE, AIM: An Ignorant Person’s Opinion of Intelligence
As far as I can tell, intelligence is nothing new, and neither is ignorance. Clearly, they both existed in measurable quantities in September 1843…
READY, FIRE, AIM: Cockroaches & Fruit Flies
According to what Mr. Ball reveals about cockroaches, it seems that they run away when they detect air movements…
READY, FIRE, AIM: Toxic People
I sometimes imagine myself as the head of a large corporation, pulling down a multi-million-dollar annual salary and making hefty donations to my favorite politicians…
READY, FIRE, AIM: I Will Not Concede
I could have refused to concede to the divorce that Darlene wanted, and that would’ve certainly made someone uncomfortable. But I didn’t, and now that’s all water under the bridge…