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Author: Louis Cannon

Underrated writer Louis Cannon grew up in the vast American West, although his ex-wife, given the slightest opportunity, will deny that he ever grew up at all. You can read more stories on his Substack account.
READY, FIRE, AIM: In Defense of Dead Voters

READY, FIRE, AIM: In Defense of Dead Voters

Posted on December 21, 2021December 21, 2021 by Louis Cannon

Apparently, Ms. Griswold provided the group with a spreadsheet from ERIC, the Electronic Registration Information Center, that contained the records the department uses to maintain a list of deceased voters…

Posted in Humor/Fiction

READY, FIRE, AIM: How to Become a Genius

Posted on December 20, 2021December 20, 2021 by Louis Cannon

On the road to learning how to become a genius, I did what most budding geniuses do. I cracked a beer, and logged in to YouTube…

Posted in Humor/Fiction

READY, FIRE, AIM: December is ‘National Impaired Driving Month’

Posted on December 17, 2021December 17, 2021 by Louis Cannon

For some odd reason, the Colorado Department of Transportation wants to pile yet another special event onto our busy December schedules…

Posted in Humor/Fiction

READY, FIRE, AIM: My Future Home in Antarctica

Posted on December 8, 2021December 8, 2021 by Louis Cannon

No, this is not a homeless encampment at the South Pole…

Posted in Humor/Fiction

READY, FIRE, AIM: Lab Animals Like Me

Posted on December 6, 2021December 6, 2021 by Louis Cannon

“Everybody is trapped in a state of anxiety, but we keep picking up our phones and checking the latest fake news and misinformation…”

Posted in Humor/Fiction
READY, FIRE, AIM: Nothing Will Make Us Happy

READY, FIRE, AIM: Nothing Will Make Us Happy

Posted on December 2, 2021December 2, 2021 by Louis Cannon

According to the website BuyNothing.com, I can buy nothing for only $9.95 — and it comes with a multiple lifetime guarantee. Refills are only $2.50…

Posted in Humor/Fiction, Video

READY, FIRE, AIM: The Most Frightening Holiday of the Year

Posted on November 30, 2021November 30, 2021 by Louis Cannon

Some people, I’m sure, would pick Christmas, based on expenses, and maxed-out credit cards. Also, the mistletoe… and the obligation to drink eggnog…

Posted in Humor/Fiction

READY, FIRE, AIM: The Sad Story of a ‘Fatally Flawed’ Vaccine Mandate

Posted on November 29, 2021November 29, 2021 by Louis Cannon

The court order states that OSHA “cannot possibly show that every workplace covered by the Mandate currently has COVID-positive employees…”

Posted in Humor/Fiction
READY, FIRE, AIM: We Can't Afford Tomorrow

READY, FIRE, AIM: We Can’t Afford Tomorrow

Posted on November 26, 2021November 26, 2021 by Louis Cannon

Ms. Ganahl is running for Governor of Colorado, against our current governor, Jared Polis. The election will take place in November, 2022…

Posted in Humor/Fiction

READY, FIRE, AIM: My Personal ‘Build Back Better’ Plan

Posted on November 23, 2021November 23, 2021 by Louis Cannon

Not that I’m opposed to streets and roads and bridges. Even my bicycle works better on paved roads…

Posted in Humor/Fiction
READY, FIRE, AIM:  'Louis, Can You Help Me Understand This?'

READY, FIRE, AIM: ‘Louis, Can You Help Me Understand This?’

Posted on November 22, 2021November 22, 2021 by Louis Cannon

But how to explain these graphs to Darlene?  Things like ‘incidence rates’ and ‘positivity rates’ sort of go over her head. (At least, they did when we were married…)

Posted in Opinion/Letters

READY, FIRE, AIM: Some Good News About Inflation

Posted on November 18, 2021November 18, 2021 by Louis Cannon

Consumer prices are rising, and if you’re living paycheck to paycheck, you might be anxious about the price of food, gas, and other items…

Posted in Humor/Fiction

READY, FIRE, AIM: Lower Your Expectations, Before It’s Too Late

Posted on November 15, 2021November 15, 2021 by Louis Cannon

“If expectations are unrealistically high they could be the basis of disappointment and low life satisfaction,” wrote the authors…

Posted in Humor/Fiction

READY, FIRE, AIM: The Virus That Just Keeps On Running

Posted on November 12, 2021November 12, 2021 by Louis Cannon

“Louis, I know you’re trying to be funny, but this is serious. Why are you implying, in your columns, that you’re not vaccinated?”

Posted in Humor/Fiction

READY, FIRE, AIM: How Much Time Are We Wasting?

Posted on November 10, 2021November 10, 2021 by Louis Cannon

“If you are an American with average commute time, you spend about 250 hours in transit each year — that adds up to more than 10 days….”

Posted in News/Politics

READY, FIRE, AIM: COVID Immunity, It Ain’t What It Used to Be

Posted on November 9, 2021November 9, 2021 by Louis Cannon

Apparently, IMAs are affected by specific endogenous antibodies. Or so the scientists tell us. Although sometimes, like the rest of us, they see things differently….

Posted in Humor/Fiction

READY, FIRE, AIM: My New, Robotic Real Estate Agent

Posted on November 8, 2021November 8, 2021 by Louis Cannon

Johnny laughed. “You will find that Louis is the old fashioned type,” he advised Jeanette. “Old fashioned, in more ways than one…”

Posted in Humor/Fiction

READY, FIRE, AIM: Doing Chores, for Fun and Profit

Posted on November 5, 2021November 5, 2021 by Louis Cannon

“Did you finish cleaning your room, Louis, like we asked you?” they would say, frowning. “Are you done with your homework? Your clothes are in the dryer and need to be folded…”

Posted in Humor/Fiction

READY, FIRE, AIM: Sticking It To the Children… Or, Into the Children

Posted on November 4, 2021November 4, 2021 by Louis Cannon

“The eligibility of 5 to 11-year-olds for COVID-19 vaccine is a really positive step for our community, and one that families have been waiting for…”

Posted in Humor/Fiction
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Latest News

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