Who knew that it could take so much water to make a double-cheeseburger? One calculation puts it at 450 gallons per quarter-pounder. And that doesn’t count the bun…
Author: Louis Cannon
Underrated writer Louis Cannon grew up in the vast American West, although his ex-wife, given the slightest opportunity, will deny that he ever grew up at all. You can read more stories on his Substack account.
READY, FIRE, AIM: You Can’t Take It With You
The US Government Accountability Office (GAO), an independent investigative agency that reports to Congress, discovered the problem and issued some suggestions…
READY, FIRE, AIM: Simply Naked Pita Chips
I didn’t even notice, until I got to the self-check-out, that the women draped across the package were all fully clothed, and in fact, professionally attired…
READY, FIRE, AIM: The Risks and The Benefits of Social Intercourse
The part of this law I wonder about is the “reasonable excuse” part. How reasonable does an excuse need to be, before the government considers it “reasonable”?
READY, FIRE, AIM: The Problem with Statues
“Historically, we’ve seen our share of racial oppression here in our little community,” explained County Commissioner Jerry Waddles, speaking last week…
READY, FIRE, AIM: Adventures in a COVID-Free Paradise
But I also hear that international travel is opening up. The airplanes are flying again. It’s not like we’re stuck here in a blood-red country…
READY, FIRE, AIM: Plop, Plop… Fizz, Fizz… Oh, What a Mistake It Is
As he peddles a dangerous product with his seemingly innocent jingle, Speedy doesn’t reveal to us the main ingredients in Alka-Seltzer: aspirin, sodium bicarbonate, and anhydrous citric acid…
READY, FIRE, AIM: Those Crazy COVID Theories
I was too young, in the early 1960s, to have any memory of the original Twilight Zone TV series — but I did enjoy the “revival” of the series that ran on CBS in the mid-1980s…
READY, FIRE, AIM: The Undying Dream of Space Travel
Because of the COVID pandemic, NASA is encouraging people to watch the liftoff from home, on a sanitized device, rather than gathering on nearby Florida beaches with their binoculars and iPhones…
READY, FIRE, AIM: Coffee & Dinosaurs
The smaller mug was a Christmas present from my niece, purchased during a trip to the Smithsonian Museum a few years ago when she was still a young child. It’s decorated with drawings of dinosaurs…
READY, FIRE, AIM: One Size, Fits All
I finally got my COVID stimulus check in the mail, and the weather being so nice, I decided to head over to Walmart and buy some new shorts…
READY, FIRE, AIM: I Hate Masks
I am not going to win this thing with logic. Logic has no bearing whatsoever on the situation…
READY, FIRE, AIM: The Cure
“I have some excellent news,” the President said with his usual confident smile. “Actually, two pieces of excellent news…”
READY, FIRE, AIM: The Brighter Side of a Virus Epidemic
There’s always a silver lining. I saw on the news yesterday, that arrests are way down…
READY, FIRE, AIM: For Lack of Honest News
So I finally give up, and switch to a classic music station. I hear the voice of Barry McGuire…
READY, FIRE, AIM: What Happened to Chocolates?
I understand that the path to a man’s heart is often littered with the bones of large, edible farm animals… beef, pork… perhaps an occasional lamb… if you’re feeling less romantic, a chicken…
READY, FIRE, AIM: A Business-Friendly Approach to Zombies
“An awful lot of adults see these zombie movies and TV shows and think zombies are frightening…”
READY, FIRE, AIM: It’s a Dog’s Life
I’m not sure what kind of glasses would be appropriate for a dog, but I suspect he would look distinguished in black frames…