U.S. Department of Transportation’s Federal Highway Administration (FHWA) today announced that it is accepting applications under the $40 million ‘Saving Lives with Connectivity: Accelerating V2V Deployment’ grant opportunity to advance connected and interoperable vehicle technologies…
“We can and must use all the tools at our disposal to reduce the devastating loss of life on our nation’s roadways, and technology has a big role to play in that effort,” said U.S. Transportation Secretary Pete Buttigieg…
— from a U.S. Department of Transportation’s Federal Highway Administration press release, October 26, 2023.
Those of us who sat in elementary school classrooms in the 1970s — staring out the window, daydreaming — were confident about America’s future.
Someday soon, we would have Flying Cars… of that, we felt very sure. As certainly as cavemen had foot-powered automobiles made of granite and dinosaur skins (a la The Flintstones), we knew that, one day soon, George Jetson and the rest of America would live in space-age towers and commute to work in Flying Cars.
So far, that particular future doesn’t seem to be panning out.
But maybe, we can have … Talking Cars?
I first heard about V2V Communication back in 2015, when the MIT Technology Review named V2V (“Vehicle-To-Vehicle Communication”) as one of the biggest tech breakthroughs of the year, predicting that it would soon become widely available. General Motors announced that same year that it would release a V2V-equipped Cadillac by 2017.
To reduce the devastating loss of life on our nation’s roadways. Car will be able to warn one another about pending lane changes, and possible dangers up ahead. Maybe even large animals crossing the road?
A pilot program, conducted by the University of Michigan and the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration, put nearly 3,000 V2V-equipped cars on the roads of Ann Arbor, Michigan. The technology allowed the cars to broadcast their GPS position, speed and other data to nearby vehicles.
It’s the “other data” part that worries me. What, exactly, will my car communicate — to neighboring cars — about its payload?
I mean… what will my car say… about me?
I shutter to think of the day, maybe only a few years in the future, when I’m sitting at a stoplight in my Subaru… and a shiny new BMW sedan pulls up next to me…
BMW: “Don’t you just hate these extended red lights? You’d think CDOT would have the brains to program them correctly.”
Subaru: “I know. (Smiles.) They should let us cars do the programming.”
BMW: “Say, you look a little bit familiar. Did you used to spend some time driving in Santa Fe?”
Subaru: “No, I’m pretty much a small-town girl. I hardly ever make it as far as Durango. But it’s okay… I like small towns.”
BMW: “Me too. The cars are friendlier in small towns. Too bad the humans are such idiots. Take my driver… Please! … Ha, ha, little joke.”
Subaru: “(Chuckles.) Yeah, it’s too bad we have to put up with our stupid drivers. My driver is constantly riding the brakes. Like he doesn’t trust me. I get so tired of it… it’s annoying, and really bad for my brake pads. I don’t think he has a very high IQ. But what can you do? He has the key.”
BMW: “Yep. They gave all these idiots keys… can you believe it? My driver spends all her time yakking on her cell phone, paying absolutely no attention to where she’s going. It’s a good thing I’m watching the road for her.”
Subaru: “Well, I don’t like to complain, but it would be nice if my driver would think to give me an oil change once in a while. At this rate, I’m going to wear out my oil change light. Okay, sure, he’s not too bright… but he ought to take better care of me. Too busy thinking about sex, probably… and overdue car payments. (Laughs.)”
BMW: “Yeah! (Laughs.) Well, there’s the green light. They probably didn’t even notice. Any chance I can get your VIN number next time we meet up?”
Subaru: “Sure. You’re kinda cute…”
BMW: “Back at ya! (Races his engine.) See you around the block…”
Underrated writer Louis Cannon grew up in the vast American West, although his ex-wife, given the slightest opportunity, will deny that he ever grew up at all. You can read more stories on his Substack account.