Reportedly, the Colorado River negotiations have not been going as smoothly as everyone wishes, and at least one negotiator has mentioned the idea of hiring a marriage counselor.
A headline on the Las Vegas Review-Journal suggests: “States seek a ‘marriage counselor’ in Colorado River brawl. Are they too late?”
I didn’t read the full article there, because the Review-Journal wanted me to fork out 99 cents for a two-month subscription, to read it. News outlets are getting so greedy these days.
Luckily, a different news outlet posted the article for me, with no paywall.
It’s not the 99 cents that bothers me. It’s the principle of the thing.
Anyway, MSN.com posted the full article written by Review-Journal reporter Alan Halaly. (I assume MSN paid the 99 cents?). And it appears that the River Compact negotiators really aretalking about hiring a mediator — who would be sort of a marriage counselor. At least, that’s the opinion of John Entsminger, general manager of the Southern Nevada Water Authority and the state’s Colorado River negotiator.
Asked about how a mediator could differ from the federal government’s intervention or the appointment of a so-called “water master” at the U.S. Supreme Court, Entsminger said states are unlikely to view a mediator’s decision-making as binding.
“It’s certainly not litigation; it’s not even arbitration,” Entsminger said. “It’s more of a marriage counselor.”
Most of us know very well that the Colorado River, bless its little heart, has been struggling to provide enough water to quench the thirst of the 40 million people living in the seven states that divert water from the river — which also includes enough water for the agricultural and industrial corporations, in those same seven states, who are even more thirsty than the actual people. Not that the River isn’t trying its best, but you can’t get blood from a turnip.
The latest models now estimate inflows into Lake Powell — the nation’s second largest reservoir — to be just 800,000 acre-feet this year, which would be the lowest since the reservoir began to fill in 1963. Personally, I think they should just fix the models, but no one else is suggesting that, apparently.
From a May 9 Aspen Times article by Ryan Spencer:
Across the West, there is a dearth of snow remaining in the mountains to melt into the Colorado River’s complex system of tributaries and reservoirs. Since the start of the “water year” in October, the Colorado River Basin above Lake Powell has seen just 79% of normal precipitation, according to the forecast center. The Colorado River Headwaters region, which includes much of northwest Colorado, has had among the lowest precipitation, with less than 70% of normal…
The Colorado River Compact from 1922 requires the Upper Basin states north and east of Lake Powell — Colorado, New Mexico, Utah, and Wyoming — to allow about half the water that accumulates in those states to flow into Lake Mead, to be used by the Lower Basin states, Arizona, Nevada and California. The 1922 Compact requires 7.5 million acre-feet per year, delivered downstream. Which we could consider to be, like, an alimony payment. But the Lower Basin states have historically used much more than 7.5 million acre feet. Now they’re expecting less than one million in 2026?
When Darlene and I got divorced — after a few failed attempts, incidentally, at marriage counseling — we agreed that neither of us needed to make alimony payments. This seemed reasonable to us, because Darlene had consistently earned more money than I did, but my expenses were much lower than hers. To continue the metaphor, Darlene was the Lower Basin states and I was the Upper Basin States.
This was a good decision on Darlene’s part, because — based on my employment history — I would have consistently failed to make the monthly alimony payments. She would have just ended up frustrated, and short of cash.
We didn’t really need marriage counseling. We just needed to get divorced.
The Lower Basin states cannot easily divorce the Upper Basin, however, because the mountains in the Upper Basin generate almost all the water in the Colorado River. But the Lower Basin can try and change the alimony agreement.
I try not to take sides when my friends are heading for a divorce. For one thing, I would make a terrible marriage counselor because I don’t know the slightest thing about making a marriage work.
Actually, that’s not entirely true. I do know the slightest thing about marriage. I know that it takes two to tango.
Things are so much more complicated when you have seven husbands fighting over the same wife.
Underrated writer Louis Cannon grew up in the vast American West, although his ex-wife, given the slightest opportunity, will deny that he ever grew up at all. You can read more stories on his Substack account.