I noticed an essay posted by our Daily Post editor Bill Hudson on Wednesday — “Three Cheers for Women’s History Month” — discussing the recent proclamation by the Archuleta County Commissioners designating March as ‘Women’s History Month.”
His editorial featured a photo showing a number of prominent local women — many of whom will, no doubt, be historical someday — smiling at the photographer at the Tuesday meeting where the proclamation was read.
To build on Mr. Hudson’s effort, I would like to offer four cheers.
When giving three cheers, people normally say, “Hip Hip Hooray! Hip Hip Hooray! Hip Hip Hooray!” Mr. Hudson did not include the actual cheer in his editorial, but merely implied the cheering, and then wandered far afield — as he often does — to touch on some mildly interesting history of “Women’s History Month”, including a reference to President Jimmy Carter’s proclamation of the precursor celebration — “Women’s History Week” — which ran from March 2-8, 1980.
I understand that three cheers are traditional, although I have not run across any explanation for there being “three” cheers instead of, say, two or four or five. Every time there’s any cheering to be done, it’s normally done — for whatever reason — in groups of three.
But in the case of Women’s History Month, and in my humble opinion, one extra cheer is quite appropriate. And I would like the cheers to be more specific than merely a vague “Hip Hip Hooray”.
Cheer Number One: Hooray for Babies!
As far as anyone knows, every single baby that has been born throughout history has been carried by a woman. This is no small task. We’re talking billions of babies. And as far as anyone knows, the men have never been terribly eager to help out, except during the “conception phase”.
This lack of male involvement in carrying the babies to term, and then nursing them and enrolling them in preschool, could be part of the reason why the global birth rate as declined so precipitously in recent decades. And I don’t think presidential proclamations of “Women’s History Week” or “Women’s History Month” can quite make up for the paucity of male effort.
Cheer Number Two: Hooray for Birthdays!
Women have been instrumental in making sure we celebrate birthdays on an annual basis, not only for their own children but also for their husbands (if they still have one) and even for their parents. This dedication to birthdays goes beyond the call of duty, in my humble opinion. I could understand completely if women carried their babies to term and nursed them and enrolled them in preschool, and then dusted off their hands and said, “Okay, kid, you’re on your own. Good luck.”
But this has not happened. All through history — and we’re talking a lot of history — women have baked the birthday cakes, or ordered them from the baking section at the supermarket, and hung the streamers and the balloons from the ceiling, and generally made us feel like we were special. (Even though we know, deep down, that we are not special.)
Cheer Number Three: Hooray for Women’s Suffrage!
For some reason, people have historically considered women unqualified to vote in democratic elections. This attitude dates back to to the ancient Greek and Roman democracies. According to online information sources, New Zealand became the first nation to enfranchise women, in 1893. (Yet another reason to celebrate New Zealand, in addition to the great background scenery in the ‘Lord of the Rings’ movies.) The petition campaign in New Zealand was led by Kate Sheppard, who also ran the first woman-owned newspaper in that country. She used her position in the Women’s Christian Temperance Union to develop relationships with politicians — not those kinds of “relationships”, mind you, but the political kind.
Similar to what happened later in the U.S., the New Zealand women’s suffrage movement grew out of the temperance movement — the main goal being, to discourage male drunkenness, apparently on the assumption that you would drink less if your wife could vote. I’m not sure whether the achievement of women’s suffrage actually helped that situation. We should probably give the credit to MADD — Mothers Against Drunk Driving, which by itself is probably worthy of a “Hip Hip Hooray” except that would put me over my limit of four cheers.
Cheer Number Four: Men Walking on the Moon
Back in 1970 — as some readers will remember — Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin climbed down the ladder of the Lunar Landing Module and made footprints on the surface of the Moon. Subsequently, several other men walked on the Moon’s surface.
For some reason, none of the people who visited the Moon during the 1970s were women. Women were left back on Earth, decorating birthday cakes and having babies. But also, working as so-called “human computers” at NASA, calculating and verifying spacecraft launch computations.
If I ever decide to launch a spacecraft, I am certainly going to have a woman check my launch calculations. Has anyone noticed the number of rockets that Elon Musk has blown up?
The flight of NASA’s Artemis II mission to orbit the Moon is planned for early April and the crew of four includes one woman, Christina Koch, who lived and worked on the International Space Station for almost all of 2019. She spent a total of 328 consecutive days in space, and participated in the first all-female spacewalks.
She took a selfie during one of her spacewalks.
As I write this column today, no women have yet been selected to actually walk on the Moon during future Artemis missions. (If that actually happens, I will definitely revise this column and add a fifth cheer.)
And since we’re on the subject, March is also “Problem Gambling Awareness Month”. Lest we forget.
Underrated writer Louis Cannon grew up in the vast American West, although his ex-wife, given the slightest opportunity, will deny that he ever grew up at all. You can read more stories on his Substack account.