Photo: Burnaby, Canada resident Eyvan Collins has curated an exhibition at Vancouver’s Kingsgate Mall featuring submitted works representing personal failures and mistakes. (Mike Zimmer/CBC)
We understand that Canada is a different kind of place. For example, they don’t want to become the 51st state… and that hesitancy dates back to before the American Revolution.
We note that Hawaiian pizza was, oddly enough, invented in Canada in 1962 by the Greek owner of the Satellite Restaurant in Chatham-Kent, Ontario.
And if you visit the Hudson Bay area, you will notice that you weigh about 2 grams lighter, due to an unexplained gravitational anomaly.
Still, I was surprised to learn about the opening of the ‘Museum of Personal Failure’ in Vancouver, British Columbia. Even for Canadians, this sounded… well, different. The pop-up exhibition took place in a shopping mall — the dubiously iconic Kingsgate Mall — and included artifacts illustrating the personal failures of about 40 artists and writers. The exhibit ran from January 24 through February 3.
(Not to be confused with the more successful and permanent ‘Museum of Failure’ in San Francisco.)
When the Museum’s curator, truck driver Eyvan Collins, was asked by CBC News host Stephen Quinn about the inspiration for the project, he replied:
“Heartbreak, to be honest. Yeah. A relationship ended, and I experienced a loss. And then, another.”
Truly, there’s nothing quite like back-to-back romantic breakups to make a person feel inspired.
“I felt like I had failed everybody. And I just felt kind of lonely, and needed to move the emotion around. I don’t know… When you fail, you’re like staring at yourself. I felt kind of self-obsessed in a way that was unsightly…
“I wanted to hear from some other people, hear other people’s stories. And spread it into a larger human experience…”
He made up posters and plastered them on telephone poles, electrical boxes, garbage cans.
“The Museum of Personal Failure is seeking submissions of artifacts – rejection letters, attempted repairs, abandoned art projects, ruined experiments – all manner of failure artifacts are welcome.”
The posters were placed at knee height, so depressed people would see them…. as they walked along, bummed out, staring down at their feet.
Soon enough, emails began to arrive from people eager to celebrate their personal failures.
Exhibitors included Mr. Collins’ mother, Jennifer Campbell, who displayed her wedding dress, stuffed into in a moving box.
“I wanted to tell a story about a failing that occurred in my marriage, and how we were able to move on,” she said. “I’ve called it Threads of Innocence, because it’s about the innocence of false fairy tales, or things that you think are going to happen when you’re young… and it doesn’t happen.”
Apparently, romantic failure runs in the family.
Knife maker Casey Vilensky of Lynn Valley Forge submitted a knife that can’t be sharpened due to an issue with the chemical properties of his quenching oil. Music producer Jamie Greenberg exhibited a hip-hop dance album of six “failed songs.” When interviewed, he claimed that failure is “ironically the most key ingredient in success.”
Michael Brooks submitted a written memoir of his life, sharing “crazy moments” and his experience as an autistic person. But he said that getting accepted into the Museum was an accomplishment.
And this brings us to the core problem with the Museum of Personal Failure. It was a success.
About 600 people per day viewed the exhibit (which is considerably more than the number of people who will read this humor column.)
But all is not lost. At least the Museum website was a substantial failure. It included only two pieces of information: the submission deadline and the submission email address. That’s it. No location, no sales pitch, no exhibition dates.
Possibly the least useful website I’ve ever come across.
I personally hope I can fail as badly, someday.
Underrated writer Louis Cannon grew up in the vast American West, although his ex-wife, given the slightest opportunity, will deny that he ever grew up at all. You can read more stories on his Substack account.