By Matt Rokowsky
Thanksgiving is often seen as a warm, joyful holiday filled with family, food, and celebration. However, for many autistic children, Thanksgiving can feel overwhelming. The combination of louder noises, strong smells, unfamiliar foods, bustling rooms, and changes to daily routines can create sensory challenges that may lead to stress or emotional overload.
But there is good news! As the CEO of Above and Beyond Therapy, where we provide personalized ABA therapy in Colorado, I have seen firsthand how practical, inclusive strategies can help autistic kids navigate sensory challenges and feel supported. By taking a sensory-friendly approach, you can create a calmer, more predictable holiday that works for your child and the entire family. Here’s how to make the day more enjoyable and stress-free.
Before making adjustments, it’s helpful to understand why Thanksgiving can feel overwhelming for some children with autism. One challenge is noise overload, as Thanksgiving gatherings often include lively conversations, clattering dishes, children moving about, and constant activity of the kitchen. Even a television playing Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade can contribute to sensory overload, which can make it difficult for some children to feel calm and focused.
The Thanksgiving feast may also have strong aromas like the roasting turkey and spices in stuffing, which can be intense for some autistic children. This combined with unfamiliar textures or flavors can make the meal stressful or uncomfortable. There may also be visual and environmental triggers at the table, such as bright decorations, busy rooms, or flashing lights. These can all be overwhelming for a child’s visual system. Spaces that feel chaotic or unpredictable may increase stress and make it harder for autistic kids to feel comfortable.
Finally, Thanksgiving may bring about social and emotional pressures. For example, interacting with relatives, being encouraged to give hugs, or participating in large-group activities can be emotionally taxing. This is especially true when daily routines are disrupted. Recognizing all these triggers is the first step in creating a more supportive and sensory-friendly Thanksgiving experience for your child.
Prepare Ahead With Predictability
Children with autism often feel more comfortable and confident when they know what to expect. You can help reduce anxiety and set the stage for a smoother, more enjoyable Thanksgiving experience just by planning ahead. One way to do this is by creating a simple visual schedule that outlines the day’s events. This might include when guests are expected to arrive, when dinner will be served, scheduled breaks, and opportunities for the child to spend time in a quiet space. Picture cards, a whiteboard, or a printed schedule can all be effective tools to use.
You can also help the child understand Thanksgiving’s traditions, potential sensory experiences, and what to expect through using brief social stories. For example, a social story can include these statements:
“People may speak loudly.”
“There may be new smells in the kitchen.”
“I can take breaks whenever I need to.”
Role-playing can also be a highly effective strategy to help an autistic child feel confident and prepared. For example, you can practice greetings such as waving, fist bumps, or verbal “hellos” (whatever feels comfortable for them). And if trying new Thanksgiving foods is part of the plan, provide small, low-pressure practice opportunities ahead of time. This can help mealtime feel familiar and manageable, rather than overwhelming.
Build a Sensory-Friendly Environment
Making a few thoughtful adjustments can have a big impact on keeping the day calm and comfortable for your child. For example, you can set up a “calm corner” or quiet space where your child can retreat to whenever they need a break. Consider including noise-canceling headphones, fidget toys or comfort objects, weighted blankets, books or other calming activities, and soft, soothing lighting. Ensure your child knows this space is available and that it’s okay to step away from the main activities at any time.
Managing noise levels is also key for a calm Thanksgiving environment. You can reduce background noise by lowering music volume, keeping kitchen doors closed, and limiting simultaneous noise sources. It can also be helpful to offer headphones during louder moments, such as when guests arrive. You can also create a calm atmosphere by adjusting the lighting. For example, avoid flickering candles or overly bright decorations. Soft, warm lighting can help your child feel more comfortable throughout the day.
Plan for Food Preferences
Food can be a significant source of stress for some autistic children during Thanksgiving, but it doesn’t have to be. First, offer safe foods that the child prefers. Set the expectation that the child doesn’t have to eat traditional holiday dishes such as turkey, stuffing, or pumpkin pie. Providing familiar, preferred foods (especially when away from home) can reduce pressure and make mealtime more enjoyable for everyone.
Another helpful strategy is allowing flexible seating and timing. For example, your child may feel more comfortable eating earlier, later, or in a quieter area. The focus should be on comfort and autonomy rather than on adhering strictly to a Thanksgiving schedule. Also try to minimize smell triggers at the table. You can do this by seating your child farther away from foods that have strong aromas and by keeping lids on dishes until it’s time to serve.
These are just a few small adjustments that can make a big difference in reducing sensory overload.
Choose Which Traditions to Keep & Which to Adapt
Not every tradition needs to be maintained if it causes stress or discomfort for your child. It is best to prioritize what matters most and consider the activities your family enjoys, such as watching the parade, playing games, or taking a walk. Focus on the elements that bring joy, and be willing to modify or skip those that may be overwhelming for your child.
You can also create new, sensory-friendly traditions! Introducing alternative activities can help your kid feel engaged and included in a way that works for them. Some fantastic activities are a cozy movie time, a quiet outdoor walk, simple crafts or coloring activities, a brief gratitude ritual, and a small dessert celebration after the main gathering. By adapting traditions and adding sensory-friendly options, you can help your child feel connected to the holiday while reducing stress and supporting their comfort.
Plan for Transitions & Travel
If Thanksgiving involves traveling or overnight stays, thoughtful preparation can make the experience more comfortable and enjoyable for your child. If traveling by car, consider packing items that help support your child’s comfort and focus. These may include snacks, headphones, a favorite show or playlist, sensory tools, and a weighted lap pad. Scheduling regular breaks will also allow your child to stretch, reset, and manage sensory input along the way.
If you are staying somewhere overnight, bring familiar items from home like bedding, pajamas, night lights, or other comfort objects. This can help maintain a sense of routine and support a restful night’s sleep. And have a backup plan! Identify quiet areas in advance, plan mini-breaks, and remain flexible if adjustments are needed. Being prepared to adapt will help ensure that both your child and the family can enjoy the holiday as comfortably as possible.
Thanksgiving doesn’t have to be chaotic or stressful. By planning ahead, being flexible, and creating a sensory-friendly atmosphere, you can transform the holiday into an enjoyable, peaceful experience for your autistic child and your entire family. Celebrate wins both big and small, protect your child’s comfort, and embrace a Thanksgiving that truly supports their needs.
Matt Rokowsky is the CEO at Above and Beyond Therapy in Colorado, which is dedicated to helping children with Autism Spectrum Disorder thrive and reach their fullest potential. In his role, Matt educates others on how to support autistic individuals, challenge stigmas, and understand the unique strengths and challenges they may face. https://www.abtaba.com/