I recently found out about a fashion trend that apparently began in Columbia.
“Butt-lifting Columbian Jeans”.
“Pantalones Columbianos Levanta Cola”, if you prefer.
From what I can tell, they’re designed mainly for women who also wear high heels.
These stylish denim pants are available from any number of online retailers, at prices ranging from $30 to $329 a pair, and in a wide range of styles and colors. But they all share one particular feature.
I spent quite a few minutes, last night, learning about these denim pants, after I saw a pair advertised in a news article about the pending government shutdown. Why, exactly, an advertiser would choose to promote butt-lifting jeans in a news article about the financial brawl between the Republicans and Democrats in Washington DC, isn’t exactly clear.
But it was a pleasant distraction from politics, to learn more about “Pantalones Levanta Cola”.
One of the best sources of information about these fashionable pants turned out to be a 2024 article by Judith Jones on WhoWhatWear.com — titled “The Reviews Don’t Lie: The Best Sculpting Jeans Will Make Your Butt Look Great”.
There’s nothing like putting on an amazing pair of jeans that instantly transforms your look and boosts your confidence, but with so many styles, fits, and fabrics, finding the perfect pair of jeans that flatters your figure, contours your assets, and fits like a glove is not always an easy feat…
There’s probably nothing I’d like better than to put on a pair of pants that boosted my confidence — which, at the moment, is at a rather low point — but I couldn’t find the men’s version of these jeans.
I wasn’t necessarily expecting to write about denim pants, however, when I began my research into the latest news, and got distracted by a harmless ad.
Mainly, I wanted to know what happens to the U.S. military when the government shuts down. Will our soldiers still get paid? Or what?
One of the primary jobs of the federal government — if I recall my American History course from 12th grade correctly — is “to provide for the common defence…”
Or, “defense” if you prefer the modern spelling.
CBS News — one of the news sources still permitted to operate in the U.S. without getting sued by the federal government — was also interested in the same question, so they had journalist Stefan Becket interview Chris Towner, policy director at the Committee for a Responsible Federal Budget, a Washington think tank. Mr. Towner didn’t think the military could use the $150 billion approved for the Pentagon over the summer, because it was “meant largely for other purposes.”
From “Soldiers likely won’t get paid during shutdown despite ‘big, beautiful bill’ funds” on CBSNews.com, September 29, 2025:
[Towner] said the department could theoretically use about $1 billion under the [One Big Beautiful Bill Act] that was designated for the Pentagon to help with immigration enforcement.
“That would be the only money that I would think that maybe they’ll spend, but I don’t even think they’ll spend that, because it’s only a billion dollars,” Towner said.
I’m not sure, but this may be the first time I’ve heard anyone use the phrase, “only a billion dollars.”
Up until 1917, the entire federal government cost us less than $1 billion a year. Times change, apparently.
As do the way jeans fit. If you’re a woman.
Active-duty service members are considered “essential personnel” and are required continue reporting for duty during a government shutdown, but without getting paid.
Maybe the duty for which the essential personnel report is also changing? At a gathering of military leaders this week, President Trump talked a lot about “the enemy within”. I hope he wasn’t talking about humor columnists, but I have the distinct impression the President doesn’t appreciate humor, unless he’s the one telling the jokes.
Underrated writer Louis Cannon grew up in the vast American West, although his ex-wife, given the slightest opportunity, will deny that he ever grew up at all. You can read more stories on his Substack account.