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Author: Louis Cannon

Underrated writer Louis Cannon grew up in the vast American West, although his ex-wife, given the slightest opportunity, will deny that he ever grew up at all. You can read more stories on his Substack account.

READY, FIRE, AIM: California and Arizona Plead Guilty… Sort Of

Posted on December 27, 2023December 27, 2023 by Louis Cannon

Hard to believe that two entire states could plead guilty of stealing water from the Colorado River…

Posted in Humor/Fiction
READY, FIRE, AIM: Everything I Needed to Know, I Learned From AI

READY, FIRE, AIM: Everything I Needed to Know, I Learned From AI

Posted on December 26, 2023December 26, 2023 by Louis Cannon

Back when I was in high school, I thought knowing stuff was the goal. It seemed like, the more stuff you knew, the more respect you got…

Posted in Humor/Fiction

READY, FIRE, AIM: Santa Claus, the Interview

Posted on December 22, 2023December 22, 2023 by Louis Cannon

“I travel around, speaking at seminars and conventions, like the one we just held in Las Vegas….”

Posted in Humor/Fiction
READY, FIRE, AIM: Private Conversations

READY, FIRE, AIM: Private Conversations

Posted on December 21, 2023December 21, 2023 by Louis Cannon

When I told my editor I was concerned about President Biden and was planning to write about him, he sent me a photo to run with the column, for my approval…

Posted in Humor/Fiction
READY, FIRE, AIM: Yes, Virginia, There is No Santa Claus

READY, FIRE, AIM: Yes, Virginia, There is No Santa Claus

Posted on December 18, 2023December 18, 2023 by Louis Cannon

Later that week, in my kindergarten class, I got into an argument with a boy named Chris about the existence of Santa Claus…

Posted in Humor/Fiction

READY, FIRE, AIM: Scientific Proof My Cat Would Gladly Eat Me, Given the Opportunity

Posted on December 15, 2023December 15, 2023 by Louis Cannon

It’s not easy living in the same house as a carnivore built for murder…

Posted in Humor/Fiction
READY, FILE, AIM: The Wisdom of Elon Musk

READY, FILE, AIM: The Wisdom of Elon Musk

Posted on December 14, 2023December 14, 2023 by Louis Cannon

Mr. Musk told Mr. Sorkin, “I have no problem being hated… hate away,” adding that it’s “a real weakness to be liked…”

Posted in Humor/Fiction
READY, FIRE, AIM:  Sympathy for the Grinch

READY, FIRE, AIM: Sympathy for the Grinch

Posted on December 13, 2023December 13, 2023 by Louis Cannon

It’s that time of year, when we traditionally celebrate cold-hearted misers like Ebenezer Scrooge, and Scrooge McDuck…

Posted in Humor/Fiction
READY, FIRE, AIM: Those Darn Historical Droughts He Warned Us About

READY, FIRE, AIM: Those Darn Historical Droughts He Warned Us About

Posted on December 12, 2023December 12, 2023 by Louis Cannon

“Despite this being a wet year, Colorado is still in the midst of the worst historical drought that we’ve seen in 1,200 years…”

Posted in Humor/Fiction
READY, FIRE, AIM: The Winners and Losers in the Fourth Republican Debate

READY, FIRE, AIM: The Winners and Losers in the Fourth Republican Debate

Posted on December 8, 2023December 8, 2023 by Louis Cannon

Not sure how that works. Winning a debate that you didn’t even show up for?…

Posted in Humor/Fiction
READY, FIRE, AIM: The Gift That Keeps on Giving

READY, FIRE, AIM: The Gift That Keeps on Giving

Posted on December 7, 2023December 7, 2023 by Louis Cannon

It’s the most wonderful time of the year.   According to singer Andy Williams, and others…

Posted in Humor/Fiction

READY, FIRE, AIM: Our Future Will Be Autonomous

Posted on December 6, 2023December 6, 2023 by Louis Cannon

Seeing the writing on the wall, Mr. Huang and Nvidia totally shifted gears and began making supercomputer hardware for AI…

Posted in Humor/Fiction
READY, FIRE, AIM: Saving Us Money in Colorado

READY, FIRE, AIM: Saving Us Money in Colorado

Posted on December 5, 2023December 5, 2023 by Louis Cannon

“I am committed to pursuing any and all possible opportunities to save Coloradoans money…”

Posted in Humor/Fiction

READY, FIRE, AIM: Life in a Contraception Desert

Posted on December 1, 2023December 1, 2023 by Louis Cannon

Growing up, out here in the American Southwest, I’ve had plenty of opportunity to perish in a burning desert…

Posted in Humor/Fiction

READY, FIRE, AIM: Where’s My Media Literacy, Mom?

Posted on November 30, 2023November 30, 2023 by Louis Cannon

Children should be allowed to read this particular humor column only with adult supervision, due to possibly mature content…

Posted in Humor/Fiction

READY, FIRE, AIM: The World’s Most Sustainable Toy

Posted on November 29, 2023November 29, 2023 by Louis Cannon

I’m speaking to you as a father who struggled with picking appropriate toys for my kids….

Posted in Humor/Fiction
READY, FIRE, AIM: The Carrot and the Stick

READY, FIRE, AIM: The Carrot and the Stick

Posted on November 28, 2023November 28, 2023 by Louis Cannon

For the past few years, the Town of Pagosa Springs has allowed a company named ChargePoint to place EV charging stations in Centennial Park…

Posted in Humor/Fiction

READY, FIRE, AIM: Not Hardly Toxic

Posted on November 27, 2023November 27, 2023 by Louis Cannon

Google and Jigsaw define toxicity as rude, bullying language aimed at intimidating a fellow internet user…

Posted in Humor/Fiction

READY, FIRE, AIM: Freedom of Speech, for Machines?

Posted on November 24, 2023November 24, 2023 by Louis Cannon

From what I’ve heard, most of the “content” now appearing on the internet is being generated by machines running specialized computer programs…

Posted in Humor/Fiction
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