I already had a Joseph Biden coffee mug, left over from 2020. I had purchased it because Joseph has the same nickname as Coffee — “Joe” — which I thought was a humorous coincidence.
Maybe his parents named him after the hot beverage, knowing that the name would come in handy, if he ever ran for President and needed to sell humorous coffee mugs to fund his campaign?
Honestly, the mug had migrated to the back of the shelf over the past four years, and I forgot I had bought it, until I visited JoeBiden.com to purchase my yard sign for the 2024 election.
The shopping website offered several different styles of yard signs (and t-shirts, and tote bags, and miscellaneous campaign merchandise) and I sort of expected to purchase a yard sign that looked similar to 2020.
Yes, they did have the old standard “Biden-Harris” logo yard signs (and t-shirts and tote bags, etc.) but to my surprise, the hot new item for the 2024 election was merchandise that looked like this:
I scratched my head, wondering what the heck was going on. Are the Democrats trying to tell us that President Biden has x-ray vision? Or am I missing the joke?
Turns out, the joke was easy to track down.
The progressive left (which I honestly don’t know much about) apparently began posting memes labeling the President as “Dark Brandon”, as a sarcastic response to the cynical 2021 social media campaign called “Let’s Go Brandon” — a phrase that became popular with the far-right (which I honestly don’t know much about.)
In 2022, “Brandon” had somehow become “Dark Brandon” — a somewhat sinister old man with glowing eyes.
At the time, the Biden administration was struggling to keep gas prices down and respond to the Supreme Court overturning Roe v. Wade. It appeared that not much of Biden’s agenda was getting accomplished — or would ever get accomplished.
Enter, stage left: Dark Brandon. Biden’s menacing, fantasy alter ego. Unbeknownst to the average American, Biden only seemed to be incompetent. Underneath the images of stumbling senility was a cold, calculating, mastermind with superhuman powers.
Sometimes, fantasy becomes reality. By the beginning of 2024, things had seemingly turned around for the Biden administration. Gas prices had dropped. Employment numbers and the economy had improved. Democrats were winning elections. Major legislation (that is, very expensive legislation) had been pushed through Congress.
Could this explain why the President has taken to wearing sunglasses lately?
At any rate, a significant amount of the merchandise available at JoeBiden.com now features the President with red, glowing eyes.
One of the campaign coffee mugs is printed with heat-sensitive ink. Joe is wearing sunglasses… until you pour in the hot coffee; then the glasses disappear, revealing the glowing red eyes of Dark Brandon.
It seems the President owns one of these color-shifting mugs.
And he says he likes his coffee dark.
I guess we will find out, in November, how many other people like their morning Joe, dark.
Underrated writer Louis Cannon grew up in the vast American West, although his ex-wife, given the slightest opportunity, will deny that he ever grew up at all.