One snowy evening, Mommy and I were decorating the Christmas tree.
I was hoping that Daddy would somehow come back from his business trip a day early so he could help us. It was only three days before Christmas and I had been a good little girl — but I didn’t know how long I could keep it up.
I wrote a letter to Santa Claus last month and asked him nicely for the presents I want. I plan on leaving him some milk and cookies just to make sure he knows I’m serious about all this. Mommy even called the North Pole and let me talk to Santa in person! It’s not all kids who get to talk to Santa Claus. He must have a secretary who has a list of all the good girls and boys and if you’re not on the list — too bad — you can’t talk to him.
I didn’t spend too much time telling him what I wanted, except for the Taylor Swift Doll that I simply must have.
I did tell him that the best gift I could get for Christmas would be if he could talk to Mommy and Daddy and get them to quit yelling at each other. I told him that I asked God to help, but He must be too busy with wars and sick people ’cause He hadn’t done anything yet.
Mommy was standing on a chair putting the angel on top of the tree when the doorbell rang. “I’ll get it!” I yelled. I ran to the front door and opened it. It was Santa Claus! I didn’t know what to say at first. I looked around to see if his reindeer were out in the front yard, but they weren’t, so I asked him where they were. He said that Rudolph had taken them down to the Grease Monkey for an oil change and he had some time to kill, so he wanted to see my Mommy and me.
Santa must have been on a diet ’cause he looked pretty skinny, but he was very, very jolly and he smelled like cigarettes. He had a twinkle in his eyes that I thought I recognized.
He patted me on my head and asked where Mommy was. I asked him if he came to talk to her about “you-know-what.” He said he did, so I grabbed his hand and took him into the living room. Mommy chuckled when she saw Santa and got down from the chair. Yep, I saw Mommy kissing Santa Claus, and there wasn’t even any mistletoe! Mommy told me that she and Santa were going to talk in the bedroom and that I should put up some more decorations. Santa Claus is very, very strong ’cause he picked Mommy up and carried her into Mommy and Daddy’s bedroom and shut the door! I figured that I better let them talk so I left them alone and sat down by the Christmas tree.
All of a sudden I heard the front door open. Maybe it was an elf, coming to get Santa? It wasn’t an elf – it was Daddy! I ran to him and hugged him and I said, “Guess what? Mommy’s in the bedroom with Santa Claus!” Daddy didn’t even take off his coat – he just ran to the bedroom and went in there without knocking and then slammed the door shut.
Well, I guess the talk with Santa Claus wasn’t working ’cause there was lots of yelling and screaming. Finally Santa ran out of Mommy and Daddy’s bedroom and he had a bloody nose. I think Daddy must have hit him!
Merry scary Christmas! Does this mean I won’t get the Taylor Swift doll?
DC has been a frustrated musician for over fifty years, and now has decided to become a frustrated writer. Learn more at DCDuncan.com. He’ll keep you posted.