READY, FIRE, AIM: Lauren Boebert Really Represents Me

I see where Secretary of State Jena Griswold announced the results of the “mandatory recount for U.S. Congressional District 3”. That’s my district, and although I didn’t personally ask for this recount, the race between incumbent Congresswoman Lauren Boebert and challenger Adam Frisch was close enough that Secretary Griswold didn’t have a choice. She had to do a recount. And bless her little heart for doing it.

Congresswoman Boebert — or as I like to call her, ‘Lauren’ — ended up with 163,839 votes, to Mr. Frisch’s 163,293 votes. (I am less familiar with Mr. Frisch, so I hesitate to refer to him as ‘Adam’. You might even say, I don’t know him from Adam.)

Prior to the recount, Mr. Frisch made it clear that he didn’t think the recount would change the outcome, and he conceded the contest to Lauren ten days after the election. He also urged he urged supporters not to donate to his campaign during the recount.

“Please save your money for your groceries, your rent, your children,” he wrote.

My children are already grown and out of the house, so that didn’t apply to me. And I can’t honestly imagine anyone, who still has children at home, having enough money to waste on a congressional candidate. But maybe Mr. Frisch’s comment was meant to be rhetorical.

Lauren will continue to represent me, as she has been for the past two years. Having won re-election by the skin of her teeth. She didn’t make a recommendation that I save my money for groceries and rent, however. (She probably guessed that my kids are already grown up.)

Instead of urging me to save my money, she has a whole section on her website where I can purchase overpriced (but attractive) merchandise to support her future re-election campaigns. Just in time for the holidays — I mean, Christmas — she has offered a $28 t-shirt that allows me to thumb my nose at anyone and everyone who doesn’t believe in Christ Our Savior. A colorful, red item. (Why would I choose any color other than red?)

I can also purchase other things from Lauren.

I can buy, for $30,a Fearless Conservatives Club membership card, with ‘Your Name Here’ right next to Rep. Boebert’s photo.

Or, for $25, I can purchase a “Drill Baby Drill” coffee mug.

But probably the most exciting purchasing opportunity on Lauren’s website is the “Let’s Go Brandon” coffee mug.

As some Daily Post readers know (but maybe not some of you, who are Democrats) a number of people in the crowd at the Talladega Speedway in Alabama began chanting (spontaneously) a certain politically charged phrase, during a race on October 2021.

At that moment, NBC Sports reporter Kelli Stavast misunderstood the phrase, and told viewers that the crowd was celebrating Sparks 300 race winner Brando Brown by chanting “Let’s Go Brandon”.

In fact, the people in the crowd were chanting “Fuck Joe Biden”. Which, if you are an NBC reporter, sounds a lot like “Let’s Go Brandon”. The phrase has caught on, with certain citizens who have a low opinion of our current President.

Lauren, my congressional representative, is offering a mug, for $25.

The mug (shown above) is printed in black ink on a white mug, and features little drawings of two popular politicians.

Donald Trump, and Lauren Boebert.

The drawings appear to be based on a photograph that Lauren posted to her Twitter account back in 2021.

Although the text written on Lauren’s dress appears to say, ‘Let’s Go Brandon’… to the discerning eye, it actually means something different. And slightly naughty?

I sort of wish Lauren has just written what she really means on her (red) dress. But then, it might have been censored by Twitter. (This was posted, in 2021, before Elon Musk had a chance to free Twitter from its political shackles.)

Those are just a few of the items Lauren has made available.

I haven’t decided, yet, which merchandise to purchase. So many choices.

Louis Cannon

Underrated writer Louis Cannon grew up in the vast American West, although his ex-wife, given the slightest opportunity, will deny that he ever grew up at all.