A man walks down the street
He says, why am I soft in the middle now?
Why am I soft in the middle?
The rest of my life is so hard
I sometimes feel like Paul Simon was talking about me, personally, when he recorded his hit song, “You Can Call Me Al” in 1986. I can’t say for sure, however, because some of the lyrics are somewhat obscure.
Of course, some of the lyrics were not the least bit mysterious. For example, I often walk down the street and say (to myself, quietly) “Why am I soft in the middle?” Doesn’t everyone?
And I don’t think the fact that Mr. Simon used the word, “man”… to reference the person walking down the street… should cause us to believe that a “woman” can’t also ask herself why she’s soft in the middle.
Yes, life is hard. But we’re soft in the middle. Why? I still haven’t yet come up with a good explanation, and I doubt Mr. Simon has either, even though he’s had nearly 40 years to consider the question since 1986.
There were other parts of the song that didn’t seem particularly relevant to my life, however.
Like:
I need a photo-opportunity
I want a shot at redemption
Don’t want to end up a cartoon
In a cartoon graveyard…
Many of us were lacking photo-opportunities in 1986. Did we need them? Maybe we did. But nowadays, everybody seems to have camera built into their phone, so it’s less of an issue. In fact, we sometimes have more photo-opportunities than we really want.
And I think we all have a shot at redemption. We just have to take it. You might hit the target, or you might not. Nothing is stopping us from taking another shot, unless we’ve run out of ammunition. And at the very least, we can document the attempt with our phones.
But the part of the song that mentions a cartoon graveyard… that’s where Mr. Simon starts to lose me.
I certainly don’t want to end up as a cartoon. No one wants to end up as a cartoon. But what, pray tell, is a cartoon graveyard?
Is the graveyard itself a cartoon? Or is it a graveyard for cartoons? I think that part of the song could have been more explicit.
Then we have some interesting imagery.
Bonedigger Bonedigger
Dogs in the moonlight
Far away my well-lit door
Mr. Beerbelly Beerbelly
Get these mutts away from me
You know I don’t find this stuff amusing anymore
Our readers may wonder why I decided to write about a cryptic hit song from 1986. And why this particular song? There were a lot of songs released in 1986 that were even more enigmatic than “You Can Call Me Al”.
Truth be told, this column was inspired by a particular line in Mr. Simon’s song, and it wasn’t the line about the cartoon graveyard. (As I’ve tried to explain, I don’t even know what a cartoon graveyard is.)
The line that inspired today’s column, was:
You know I don’t find this stuff amusing anymore
I try — I really do try — to see the bright side of life. The humorous side of life. I really try to write about things that can make people smile. That’s why they pay me the big bucks.
But the fact is… you know… I don’t find this stuff amusing anymore.
I don’t think anyone is finding this stuff amusing, anymore. And I don’t blame them for feeling that way.
Feeling like we’re going to end up cartoons, in a cartoon graveyard.