READY, FIRE, AIM: Cocoa Content

Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re going to get.

— Forrest Gump

Valentine’s Day this year wasn’t a complete loss.

Fortunately, I have an {N}power account at Natural Grocers — which allows the company to keep track of my purchases, and thus do a better job of marketing to me. And yesterday, in apparent gratitude for sharing my shopping rituals with them, Natural Grocers gifted me with a free Valentine’s Day Chocolove® candy bar.

Absolutely free.

Like, I just walked in, and picked out a chocolate bar, and it was free. (“One per {N}power account.”)

I had my choice of cocoa content and various flavor enhancements.

Of course, it’s completely possible that this wasn’t just a ‘reward’ for allowing the corporation to track my purchasing patterns. It’s also possible the owners and the local staff really like me.

Since no one else gave me candy or flowers or even a Hallmark card yesterday, this act of affection on the part of Natural Grocers sort of defines them as my Valentine’s Day date.

And maybe, also defines me as their Valentine’s Day date.

It would have been nicer, of course, if the chocolate bar had a ribbon tied around it… like the box of Whitman’s chocolates that my dad always gave my mom on Valentine’s Day.

And I didn’t get a kiss from the checkout clerk (which would have been a nice touch.)

In fact, the gift felt a bit ‘corporate’, like the free computer software update I got from Apple, a few days prior to Valentine’s Day, but in the same spirit of affection.

That box of Whitman’s chocolates that Mom received every Valentine’s Day had — and I’m estimating here — about three dozen different types of bonbons, and Mom always allowed us kids to try one or two of them. (Since Dad didn’t get us our own boxes, for some reason.)

Some of the bonbons had delightful flavors, but some, you wished you could put back in the box after the first bite and trade them for another chance.

The situation yesterday at Natural Grocers was somewhat the same, in the sense that the staff had set out a display of various Chocolove® candy bars, and you got to pick one. (One per customer.) But unlike my mom’s Whitman box, with its hidden secrets, the Chocolove® bars were wrapped in paper labeling that told you plainly what you were going to get.

“Almonds and Sea Salt.” “Raspberries in Dark Chocolate.” “Salted Caramel.”

And the “cocoa content” was also displayed legibly. “55% Cocoa Content.” “70% Cocoa Content.”

Cocoa content has become essential to the American lifestyle recently.

We all know we shouldn’t swallow everything the scientists tell us, especially if the studies appear online. But it’s extremely tempting to believe the studies that show cocoa to be high in chemicals called polyphenols, which can improve blood flow to the brain.

I will say, without a doubt, I felt smarter after eating my free Chocolove® candy bar yesterday.

And I also felt more loved. In a corporate sort of way.

Louis Cannon

Underrated writer Louis Cannon grew up in the vast American West, although his ex-wife, given the slightest opportunity, will deny that he ever grew up at all.