By Chris Houston
Nobody would hesitate to explain that they missed hockey practice due to a broken leg. In some circles, scars are badges of honor. When I was a kid, students would gleefully sign their names in Sharpies on their friend’s orthopedic cast.
If you see a friend with a physical injury, you’ll probably ask them about it, and likely they will tell you. “How are you?” is a ubiquitous greeting, and mostly people glibly give happy one-word answers like “fine” or “great.” I like to surprise friends who ask by giving them sincere answers. My better half cringes when I give brief but honest answers to strangers who enquire.
I keep doing it, though, because I think it’s important to discuss how we are really doing. My sincere answers to “how are you?” sometimes catch people off guard. A question that I sometimes ask, however, has proven to be a real eye-opener. “How’s your mental health?” never gets a glib answer. People don’t expect that one. But often the question provokes really meaningful conversations.
Still, I don’t commonly ask people about their mental health. To some, it remains a deeply private topic. But maybe it shouldn’t be. I wonder how things might be different if we were just as quick to comment on our anxiety or depression as we were our headaches. Normalizing these chats erodes the stigma.
Stigma inhibits conversation about mental health and I think we might have more comprehensive healthcare if we were all more comfortable talking about it.
I’ve spoken in public and written about my mental health. I find that after I do so, people share their stories. Such stories are widespread. Years ago, I never thought much about mental health. During my recent short stint of local newspaper reporting, housing, poverty, substance use, and mental health were the most commonly discussed topics. They sometimes don’t, but often do, overlap.
I used to think that when people spoke about problems, they were looking for solutions. I’m older and wiser now and I know that sometimes people just need to talk. Talking about mental health is therapeutic for folks. And yet, starting conversations about mental health can be difficult. We’re not used to it. Many avoid even learning about it. I like the BeThere.org website, which offers free lessons on how to support someone struggling with their mental health.
The website offers golden rules on how to kick-start conversations: say what you see, show you care, and hear them out, know your role, and connect to help.
If you have a mental health issue, you are likely much less alone than you think. Regarding PTSD, a 2019 paper published in the Red Cross’s academic journal notes that an “estimated 50 percent of men and 60 percent of women experience at least one trauma during their lifetime. Around 8 percent of these men and 20 percent of these women develop PTSD. In a given year, 8 percent of the general population has a current diagnosis of PTSD.” The paper extrapolates that around 26 million people in the United States live with PTSD.
The fact that women experience trauma at a rate double digits higher than men, should not go unnoticed.
According to data published by the National Institute of Mental Health 23 percent of U.S. adults lived with a mental illness in 2022. So, likely, you know people living with mental disorders. The sooner we all talk about it, the better it is. Practice it: “How is your mental health?”
October 10 was World Mental Health Day.
Mental Health America operates a text/phone crisis line accessible via 988.
Chris Houston, syndicated by PeaceVoice, is the President of the Canadian Peace Museum non-profit organization.